Random observations and assorted silliness
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August 10, 2021
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July 16, 2021
When mourning doves fly, they sound like dogs' chew toys.
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July 14, 2021
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July 7, 2021
"Dr. Walker, the Seventies are on line 3."
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June 28, 2021
As the old saying goes, you can tell a lot about the clientele a place wants to attract from its restroom signs.
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June 10, 2021
The Audrey Jr. twins say, "Feed us!"
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May 16, 2021
Another 400 million or so and a hurricane-force updraft, and I should be in business. A friend complimented me on the colors of this photo, and I thanked her, said I doubted that pretty colors would help me get airborne, but that at least I would look good not doing so. She noted that that was, of course, what counted.
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May 2, 2021
Almost every time I turn on my shower, it whines for several seconds. I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason for this having to do with water pressure or whatnot, but I prefer to think there's a banshee living in the pipes.
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April 27, 2021
#CustomerService
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April 23, 2021
When I went to water my basil plants this morning, I saw this new arrival. I'm presuming she's from a late sprouting seed. The other alternative is that the adolescent seedlings in the pot have been getting up to some hanky panky after lights out...
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April 15, 2021
Look out, that wet floor'll have you doin' the Watusi if you're not careful.
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April 12, 2021
My big pink shower poof falls off the edge into the tub so often that I'm beginning to wonder if it's migratory. A friend suggested that it might be a tribble.
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March 21, 2021
One of the joys of having long hair is that I'm shedding constantly. I sometimes feel like I live with a sheep dog.
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March 12, 2021
As the old saying goes, you can tell a lot about the clientele of a place from the graffiti in its restrooms.
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March 10, 2021
It occurred to me this morning that the old English music hall tune "I'm Henry the VIII (I Am)," revived in the 1960s by Herman's Hermits, aptly illustrates the definition of insanity: doing something over and over and expecting a different result. The question is, who's the more crazy: the widow for thinking the 8th Enery will last when the previous seven didn't, or the 8th Enery for thinking he'll be the one to survive? (NB: The video link is below the image.)
Harry Champion, I'm Henry the VIII (1911)
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March 9, 2021
Today is our first spring-like day, and appropriately enough, it's also the first day I've seen crocuses in my neighborhood. With the sun out, I decided it was a Camper Van Beethoven kinda day for my walk. While we're on the subject, I wonder why after three-plus decades we still don't know where the hell Bill is? (Fwiw my money is still on the Vespa scooter.)
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March 2, 2021
My impersonation of a protractor
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February 22, 2021
The bizarre and rarely observed mating ritual of FedEx trucks. The female of the species is the larger truck (in back). Note that the license plate on the front of the male truck has come partially detached, indicating that copulation has been completed.
A high school friend said that he read this "in David Attenborough’s voice." I responded, perhaps truthfully, "I think Samantha Bee's voice was in my head when I wrote it."
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February 14, 2021
From
my oven to your eyes: a heart attack on a plate, aka lemon-orange bundt
cake. 4 c flour, almost 4 c sugar (counting the confectioner's sugar
for the glaze), 10 eggs, 2 sticks of butter, and 1 cup dairy (the recipe calls
for heavy cream [sic], but I substituted equal parts half and half and
farm-fresh buttermilk, since I had the latter on hand for biscuits). I've survived two of these in the past, so I like my chances this time.
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February 10, 2021
I've started a mini herb garden: curly parsley and basil. The seeds were older, so I dropped several in each hole I made. There's gonna be a Darwinian bloodbath in both pots not too long from now.
A friend asked whether "a Darwinian bloodbath" means "the pesto will make itself"? I replied, "Not quite: it'll be up to me to conscript the garlic and cheese."
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As I took this photo, I was humming the tune to "Let It Snow," and I swear I heard my plant mumble, "There but for the grace of God..."
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February 5, 2021
Am I the only one who missed the memo about the rapture?
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February 3, 2021
I feel like Cancel Culture would be a great name for a band.
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December 3, 2020
And then we'll take it higher...
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